# Old Dog - Back End Going Help?



## shiro_ookami

I have a 13 year old lab who is such a wonderful dog.

We took him to the vets recently as his weight was just dropping off, the vet did tests there and then and told us he had some type of cancer, they didn't know where and said he wasn't in pain but they said not to operate as he didn't have long left and it was not fair to put him through it.

They said he was fine to stay alive as he wasn't in pain and his quality of life was fine.

Yesterday his back end seemed to droop a bit and he is ever so skinny =( He looks so ill...but the vets warned us he would turn into a skeleton as the cancer would be eating him away. But today his back end seems really low down and weak.

I think his back end is going to collapse..how do you know its going to happen and what are the actions to take once a dogs back end goes? He is standing but he is just standing and staring into space...

I don't want it to be time but he is 14 in july...I really do not know if it is time to say goodbye..but if it is how do I do it? He is my best friend, i've grown up with him, he's my little man. I don't know if I can say goodbye, but I want to do what is right for him not for me.


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## freekygeeky

my friends labradors back end went at the end of last year, the vets warned them, and told them to say their good byes...
a few days later he perked up, and had a further few months of happiness before he was put down...

only you/ the vet knows whats right, you'll know when its the time sadly....


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## gnipper

Unfortunately it sounds like its time to let him go, I had to get my old dog put down last year and its a really hard thing to do but we have to do whats best for the animal.


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## feorag

Nobody ever wants to make that decision, but you have to think of it as a decision you can make in the best interests of the animal you love.

I look on it as the final gift of love that I can give my pet - a death free of pain and fear - that I couldn't even give to a parent, partner or child.

You are in a very unenviable position and I doubt, to be honest, that there isn't anyone on this forum who hasn't been there themselves before you and wouldn't swap you places now for all the money in the world - I certainly wouldn't! :sad:

To be honest I would rather give up a week too soon, than leave it 1 day too late and have to live with the knowledge that my reluctance to part with an animal I love so very much was the cause of it suffering any pain or fear. In over 40 years of pet ownership I have had 1 cat and 4 rabbits die at home and everything else I've had to make that decision on behalf of and believe me I'd rather than every time than walk into my house and find a dead pet and not know whether me being there might have prevented that death or comfort the animal in its last hours. At least taking the euthanasia route, every one of those many pets that I've loved have 'fallen asleep' in my arms at the vets or at home, totally relaxed and unafraid and I'd choose that option every time.

Try reading this poem and see if it helps you to make that decision.


*IF IT SHOULD BE*​


If it should be that I grow weak 
And pain should keep me from my sleep
Then you must do what must be done
For this last battle can't be won

You will be sad, I understand
Don't let this grief then stay your hand
For this day more than all the rest
Your love for me must stand the test

We've had so many happy years
What is to come can hold no fears
You'd not want me to suffer, so
The time has come, please let me go.

Take me where my needs they'll tend
And please stay with me to the end
Hold me firm and speak with me
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me
Although my tail its last has waved
From pain and suffering, I've been saved.

Please don't be sad it must be you
Who has this painful thing to do
We've been so close, we two, these years
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.


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## Rach1

that poem is so sad yet so true..

only you can decide when its time to let go but i agree with feorag... its better to see your little man pass away with love in his heart than leave it too long...
i wish you all the best in your decision, and send warm thoughts your way...you'll do the right thing!


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## ditzychick

Such a beautiful poem

I had to make the decision a few years ago for my little yorkie Blue. I'd had her since i was 11 and she was 14 when we realized it was time to say goodbye. It was the one of the hardest things i have ever had to do, she was my best friend we had been through a lot together. She eventually was, totally blind and had senile dementia as well as epilepsy. She didn't know who i was anymore. So a few days after my birthday she went down hill and the decision was made. It broke my heart to let her go and i still wonder if i did the right thing i know i did but there is always the what if. Though something feorag said "I would rather give up a week too soon, than leave it 1 day too late" is very true.

Only you can make the decision and be at peace with it. You will never forget those that have touched your heart in such a way.


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## Rosiemum

shiro_ookami, feorag has put it beautifully. 

Your dog is not my dog. I don't know him as you do. I think if one of my own elderly dogs was in the same situation, I might be thinking very hard about what decision I should make, but only you have the connection with your dog; only you can decide what to do.

I will pass on one piece of advice I was given once, which has helped me a lot at times like this.

Think of three things your dog loves to do. When it gets to a point where he can no longer do two of them, then - maybe it's time.

We've all been there; we all know what it's like. 

Thinking about you.


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## feorag

ditzychick said:


> Such a beautiful poem.


I carry copies of that poem in my purse and if ever I meet anyone who is upset because they've just had a pet pts, I give them a copy to read.

I've come home from making that decision on every occasion blaming myself in some way for having done it.

Asking myself "Did I give up too soon?", "Should have fought for him longer?", even "Have I just taken the easy way out?"

But in my heart of hearts I know I've done the right thing - because I've seen the look in that loved animal's eyes and they've told me that they've had enough.

I firmly believe if you truly love an animal and you share that wonderful bond between you, then that animal will tell you when it's had enough - look in his eyes and he'll tell you - it's hard to describe but the eyes sort of lose the light out of them when they are giving up.

Can't believe I'm now sitting here with tears running down my face! :roll:


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## Shell195

Reading this brings it all back so many times for me, its never an easy decision but one that Ive had to make so many times
I agree with Feorag too

Thinking of you at this very sad time


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## shiro_ookami

Rosiemum said:


> I will pass on one piece of advice I was given once, which has helped me a lot at times like this.
> 
> Think of three things your dog loves to do. When it gets to a point where he can no longer do two of them, then - maybe it's time.
> 
> We've all been there; we all know what it's like.
> 
> Thinking about you.


Thank you all for the advice. I thought of the three things he loves to do 1. go for walks 2. go swimming and 3. run around the garden like a pup again. He can no longer do any of them =(

I think his back end is going to go any day now and I think its time for him, I want to do what all of you have said though: id rather be one week too early rather than one day too late.

My only problem is I think its time for go, but my mum doesn't think it is...


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## LisaLQ

Maybe if you book a vet visit (nothing final, just a check up to set your minds at rest) you can get the vet to get her to see sense? It's hard to let go sometimes, but I can assure you it's easier helping them go without any suffering than waking up to an animal who's passed away in pain :-(


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## shiro_ookami

Been to the vets tonight and the vet said he is not in pain and he is fine and he doesnt think it is time to end his life at the moment. He said to keep in touch if anything changes, gave his a steroid injection and hopefully things will pick up.


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## corny girl

What a lovely poem, sat here in tears as i too will have to make that decision some time this year. My old Lurcher is 14, she's lost weight, gets wobbly on the back end but only 2 mins ago she was telling one of the Greyhounds off as they were trying to lay on her :2thumb:. She is the boss, still enjoys life & still has the sparkle in her eyes. I know when that sparkle fades it will be time to say goodbye , hopefully not for a while yet though.


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## Big Red One

Same as the others have said really, once a dog's 'back end' goes it's really time to make a tough decision.
Our old RSPCA 'pup' (she was 13) Snoopy had a tumour which eventually meant she couldn't pass urine unaided, that was the point that enough was enough, her eyes told me she was no longer enjoying her life. The vet agreed and we made the decision to let her go.... 

Personally, I would leave him as long as he can 'cope' day to day, once the point is reached where he can't, then that may be time.

Just enjoy the time you all have with him now, is all you can do.


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