# Do you feel that you can post?



## vikki3683 (May 16, 2008)

Hi guys
I was wondering if any of you feel that you cant post/ask questions at the risk of either sounding stupid/no one replying/nasty replies etc?
I feel that I cant post much because alot of my posts have had no or little replies.
Does this just happen to the new forum members? or does it happen to the 'older' members also?


----------



## AshMashMash (Oct 28, 2007)

It is a pitty that people do sometimes get 'flamed'. I think it occurs most often when people are suspecting an animal may suffer to a persons ignorance... whether thats lack of research, lack of caring, or whatever. People get angry quick when an animal may be suffering. 

But, if you are asking a straight forward question like "What does this mean?", I think people are normally fine. 

Some threads dont get many replies... but I dont think its ever intentional. And certainly new members aren't ignored. 

Thats whats good about this section: the lack of flaming. But, whats bad is its pretty quiet. If you dont get a response here, try putting it in a different (appropriate!) section


----------



## negri21 (Oct 8, 2007)

vikki3683 said:


> Hi guys
> I was wondering if any of you feel that you cant post/ask questions at the risk of either sounding stupid/no one replying/nasty replies etc?
> I feel that I cant post much because alot of my posts have had no or little replies.
> Does this just happen to the new forum members? or does it happen to the 'older' members also?



there is a search function for 98% of questions that need asked .

if you do have a question and word it correctly then you will get the right advice without flaming .

flaming starts because folk come out with silly statements that make it sound as if they have trouble opening a door never mind looking after a pet .


----------



## HadesDragons (Jun 30, 2007)

People generally only get "flamed" if they ask for advice, are given it, then refuse to take it, or if it's a very simple question and they are asking on here rather than spending 5 minutes on Google / using the search button...

I don't know which of your questions you are referring to when you say you haven't got many responses - I've had a quick look through some of your threads, and the ones I have looked at have either already been answered in the first couple of posts (in which case there isn't really a need for another 10 people to post "I agree"), or you're asking about a rarer species - e.g. the Monkey Tails. I know of only a couple of people on here who keep them and could actually give you photos etc... You have to remember that if it's a difficult question, it may take time for someone to be able to tell you the answer, simply because most people don't know the answer...


----------



## rantasam (Nov 28, 2006)

I think it's important to remember that the Newbie Advice section is moderated with the view that no question is too simple/stupid and that no question can be asked too often. This section was created in response to certain negative responses in the main sections and I personally would hate to feel that someone was reluctant to ask any question - but especially in this area.

For me, if I have a question that I would like a 'general' response to e.g. how many people would choose A or B, then I would post it in the main sections. If I had a specific question about something specialised then I would PM members on here I trust to be able to give specialised advice. 

I think it's important to remember that this forum is just like any other cross section of people - some will be helpful and willing to share what they know, others may use their expertise to help them feel superior.. knowledge is power and all of that. If you have asked questions that you feel haven't been answered as fully as you'd wish, then I would post again and say something along the lines of "I've asked this before, but didn't get much response...". In my experience the majority of people on here are decent and I have certainly learned huge amounts (compared to what I knew before coming on here) in the couple of years I've been posting.


----------



## the-tick (Nov 27, 2006)

vikki3683 said:


> Hi guys
> I was wondering if any of you feel that you cant post/ask questions at the risk of either sounding stupid/no one replying/nasty replies etc?
> I feel that I cant post much because alot of my posts have had no or little replies.
> Does this just happen to the new forum members? or does it happen to the 'older' members also?


It happens to all of us newbies oldies and inbetweenies, don't worry and keep posting


----------



## Declan123 (Dec 29, 2007)

the-tick said:


> It happens to all of us newbies oldies and inbetweenies, don't worry and keep posting


True :devil:


----------



## Ghostface (May 31, 2007)

At the end of the day - whether you feel intimidated or not, *ask* what you need to. You're in need of help, and owe it to your animal to ask for it. There's only so much words on the internet can intimidate someone, it's not as if you have a real live person screaming in your face calling you thick.

Some peoples replies, including mine sometimes, can come across as harsh - i'm sure it's not meant to come across like that, we're just trying to get the reply across as straight forwardly as possible and sometimes the only way to do that is to be blunt.

Don't take it personally, we're all here for the same reason, and we were all the new person at some point. 

We'd much rather see someone asking a what some would call a stupid question, than not asking at all and getting it completely wrong, resulting in an unwell animal : victory:


----------



## Karl_1989 (Jan 19, 2007)

To be honest this forums gone down hill abit, It used to be full of helpfull people full of friendly advice.
But since the 18+ section was put in there been more and more idiots on here and most of the good ones have left.

Now its full of people who seem to think they know it all cos they brought a leo and browsed the forum for 5 mins


----------



## Mujician (Mar 7, 2007)

I voted no - I feel I can, but all the time I'm disappointed by no replies from everything I post


----------



## Rou (Dec 23, 2007)

I know how you feel with what you are stating as I felt a lot like that when i first joined but i have found in the few months that i have been a member that by doing outside research before asking a question such as internet or books you get a lot of your questions answered that way.

what i tend to do is look else where for an answer and then use that information and ask "is this correct" or "what do you think about this". If I can't find my answers else where thats when i write something like "not to sound stupid but i cant find this anywhere, can anyone tell me".

With the flaming, I have had several members on here flame up at me for asking a silly question then when i read how i have written it i understand why they have got a bit irate about what im asking.

I have also noticed by observing many replies to other questions and topics who the flamers are. These so called flamers often tend to be the ones who feel they know all about everything. Its these know-it-alls you haven't got to listen too as they often don't have a clue lol. (not aimed at any in particular as i haven't got anyone to point this at).

The more you start your own threads and the more posts you reply to the more your knowledge will expand and your reputation for being a good forum member will build. it takes time but if you have a question go ahead and ask it! :2thumb:


----------



## Greenphase (Feb 9, 2008)

I am an older user that has returned to the forum.My old name was deleted and i have now resolved those problems with tbo.

I did notice that after my return i was not taken as seriously as i would have been had i had more posts.Unfortunately a lot of people seem to think that post count means everything.Forget the fact that you could have made 1000 posts within the off-topic section rather than in your specific areas.


It is a shame that some people feel this way especially to new people that may well have been keeping reptiles for years and have a very good knowledge base but then are made to feel unwelcome by some people.

Im not saying that everyone is this way it is just something i have noticed since returning to the forum.This is a very good forum and has a wealth of knowledge on it.

The search function is helpful but can also lead you to reading 20 or 30 threads before you can find what you are actually trying to get an answer to.Sometimes you just dont have the time to do this as you need a reply quickly ie you have just had eggs laid and what do you do with them.

I was always taught by my parents that there is only one stupid question and that is the question that was never asked so believe that if you need to know something someone somewhere will be able to give you the answer to it.

Even after over 20 years of reptile keeping and being an ex reptile shop owner there are still questions that i need to ask.

One final note is that you will learn something new every day of your life and if you dont its because you are dead.You can never know everything about any subject so dont be afraid or hesitant to ask for advise.


----------



## Rou (Dec 23, 2007)

Boas n Burms said:


> I am an older user that has returned to the forum.My old name was deleted and i have now resolved those problems with tbo.
> 
> I did notice that after my return i was not taken as seriously as i would have been had i had more posts.Unfortunately a lot of people seem to think that post count means everything.Forget the fact that you could have made 1000 posts within the off-topic section rather than in your specific areas.
> 
> ...


Ahmen brutha!


----------



## Meko (Apr 29, 2007)

vikki3683 said:


> I feel that I cant post much because alot of my posts have had no or little replies.


 
Now i'm not flaming you, just answering honestly...


what exactly do you expect on your threads? I've just had a look and you've started 28 new threads in 13 days. All of them have replies and yeah all of them might not have loads of replies but about 99% of your threads have given you the information you asked for in the replies, some people (although its getting rare) read the entire thread before replying so if they've seen that you've got your answer there's no point them replying.

On top of that you've asked how you go about starting a rescue and then how you go about opening a shop. You asked the question but didn't reply to any of the replies to you. 
Like this one - http://www.reptileforums.co.uk/lizards/134027-gecko.html - you asked about geckos and when somebody replied you didn't respond to them but you're saying that you don't get many replies. Using a forum is a 2 way thing, you don't just ask a question and wait for loads of people to reply and you take the information and run. 
You also asked about MTS, got one reply and asked if anybody else was going to help you.. the answer to that is probably no as there's only one person i know of on the forum who has them and it was her who replied.

It's not the amount of replies you get thats important its the quality of information in the posts you get..


----------



## vikki3683 (May 16, 2008)

Thanks for all of your replies.
I wasnt getting at anybody in starting this thread - i was simpley asking as I am moderator and administrator on another site and some of the members feel unable to post. I wanted to see if it were the same on other forums.
I have not replied to some of my posts because ive either been nusy with my children or Ive been poorly - I have recently been in hospital after suffering with a breakdown and I get a bit forgetful at times - ill only remember to check posts that i have started a few days or so down the line. I dont do it on purpose - its a side effect of medication and illness etc.
I did not intend for this topic to cause any offense or arguments or misunderstandings.


----------



## eeji (Feb 22, 2006)

I've been here since what feels like when time began..... It was really friendly and a fun place to be back then. I was never off the forum, it had a really good community feel to it and I made lots of good friends here.

Then as it grew it started attracting the 'know-it-alls' - the sort of person who's opinion was set in stone and is the only way to do something. Anyone who had alternative ideas got flamed, and so the forum started to split.

Once people had their own group of friends on the forum, the bitching and backstabbing started between groups. By this time, a lot of good people had left the forum.

I don't post very often on here and don't create many threads mainly for this reason.

Don't get me wrong, there still are lots of genuine and helpful people here, but for me the 'community spirit' has long gone which is a great shame.

People on here need to set aside their differences and unite as one. Sure everyone can have their opinions and methods, but please, think before you shoot someone down in flames. If you don't agree with someones methods, then by all means have your say, but is there really any reason for people to get nasty about things? and if someone suggests an alternative way to yours, at least consider what they have said before starting a war.

my 2 cents.


----------



## Crownan (Jan 6, 2007)

Personally I will post threads and replies on anything, I will say whatever I think and if people dont like it, what do I care? Its a load of randoms sitting behind a PC screen! So what if they 'flame' me? If the flaming is warrented then I will take heed of the advice etc, fairy snuff. But if its just opinion and nothing more....who cares?


----------



## chris_walton (Dec 20, 2007)

i'm quite newish here and find its just one of those things i have replied to threads where i think i can help people and often think that sometimes you have to be in some sort of click to be able to fit in 

ive got to know quite a few members on here now and really enjoy coming on everyday but sometimes i do feel that i cant reply to some threads that i would do on other forums 

the worse section on here by far is the tortoise section you cant reply nothing without beeing shot down or threatend with legal action from members from another group but im sure mods are always watching over this section i wont post in there anymore unless noone has answered someones cry for help 

but i dont mind posting in other topics if i feel i can join in sometimes its a bit off putting though when noone replies to your posts but i keep on anyway 

chris


----------



## AshMashMash (Oct 28, 2007)

People really _really _shouldn't even consider post count when deciding whether that person is acceptable to take advice off, it really means nothing!

I have 3500+ posts in _one_ offtopic thread alone :blush: it means nothing, lol.


----------



## jaf2212 (May 10, 2008)

AshMashMash said:


> People really _really _shouldn't even consider post count when deciding whether that person is acceptable to take advice off, it really means nothing!
> 
> I have 3500+ posts in _one_ offtopic thread alone :blush: it means nothing, lol.


 
I have to agree, I have only just signed up so have a low post count and don't reply to every post, so people take it that you are new to repiles and don't know anything. That is the wrong, people judge to quickly, I have not been keeping reptiles long but have spent 100+ hours researching.

Sometimes there are people on the forums who are here for one reason, to start agruements. If you have time then research first otherwise the idea of these forums is so you can ask questions.


----------



## TAXI (Apr 5, 2008)

Oh yeah BABY if i go down........... i'll go guns a blazing:war:


----------



## Miranda (Dec 25, 2006)

Often i dont reply incase someone says to me no thats totall wwrong.


----------



## Spider Call (Mar 23, 2007)

I will post anywhere with confidence.... 
Except the shelled section.
Shelled section is a nono D: 
They eat people rather than helping most of the time.


----------



## fatratsandcheesekk (May 18, 2008)

i feel fine with posting but sometimes i do feel bad with all the cr:censor:y comments from some posters who get really hot headded then use scare tacktics


----------



## Tina (Apr 9, 2007)

chris_walton said:


> the worse section on here by far is the tortoise section you cant reply nothing without beeing shot down or threatend with legal action from members from another group but im sure mods are always watching over this section i wont post in there anymore unless noone has answered someones cry for help
> 
> chris





Spider Call said:


> I will post anywhere with confidence....
> Except the shelled section.
> Shelled section is a nono D:
> They eat people rather than helping most of the time.


 
I have to ask... how long is it since either of you posted in Shelled? Yes there were problems in the past but there haven't been for many months now. There's a different group of people using shelled now who are far more tolerant. There'll always be a minority that are fixed in their ideas, just as there are in every section, but it's certainly not the majority. In the time I've been mod'ing in shelled I've not seen either of you post or get flamed. 

I'd be interested in vikki3683's opinion of shelled as she very recently started a thread in there... no flaming went on and everyone who posted on the thread tried to give good advice and welcome her to the section.

People who make comments like yours just put newbies off going into the shelled section where they do get good advice and do get treated in a friendly way. Unfortunately not many of the shelled users (other than the few who keep other reps) venture into other areas of the forum so any questions asked in Newbies tend not to get any replies. 

There was a similar thread started in off-topic a few days ago and I'll say here what I said there... if you don't want to reply to a newbies thread in a positive way then don't reply - it's not hard to hold off hitting 'submit reply'. Newbies quite often google before they come on here and read such conflicting advice that they're totally confused before they ever make a post on RFUK. A lot of the time they join RFUK just to get confirmation of what is good and what is bad about what they've already read.


----------



## cervantes (Apr 24, 2008)

I'll post and I'll comment as I wish. I don't know much but sometimes you don't need to. 

Most people use the new post button, so a thread will quickly get lost, thats why theres so many Bumps. Don't worry about it. 

Lots of young people on this site ask strange questions, and make rash statements, change their minds all the time. 

Just make sure your looking after your animals the best you can. the Forum is not a substitute for observation....Good luck....


----------



## freekygeeky (May 25, 2007)

Ask away, doesnt matter how silly the question seems to you. 
I do it al lthe time, yes sometimes i get ''moaned'' at. But you also get good replies. I will always help someone if its about a crestie, garg, leo if im not positive i will say so.. but i will always try to help


----------



## lilnod88 (Apr 4, 2008)

If i feel confidant enough in my answer then i will post.. i know im one of those people on here that have asked sum strange questions too.. and answers:whistling2: lol..one thats springs to mind was about kangaroos:whistling2:
Tbh im not really bothered by the few people that may have a go.. cant really expect everyone to be helpful.. its just nice even if someone doesnt agree, to say it in the nicest way possible.. people come here for friendly helpful advice not to be slated.. we all started somewhere.. right??: victory:


----------



## TAXI (Apr 5, 2008)

vikki3683 said:


> Hi guys
> I was wondering if any of you feel that you cant post/ask questions at the risk of either sounding stupid/no one replying/nasty replies etc?
> I feel that I cant post much because alot of my posts have had no or little replies.
> Does this just happen to the new forum members? or does it happen to the 'older' members also?


Well i tell you what...You've done a dam good job on this thread....:no1:


----------



## ratboy (Jan 10, 2007)

One point to remember is when you ask your question or make your point, there may not be anyone on line that knows the answer. A problem of busy forums is that there are many threads in a day and your thread is not going to be on the first page for long unless somebody does answer it.

There are many, myself included, who do not look past the first say 2 pages of threads in a forum, so it is not really that surprising that some threads get little or no attention.

The same applies with flaming etc. I have noticed that people tend to jump on band wagons. If somebody says "This is bad" then people tend to agree with that sentiment and those that think that actually, it may not be that bad after all tend to wait until somebody else has the courage of their convictions to say so and then agree with them.

It's all about being brave enough to stick your head above the parapet and say what you believe and be prepared to be shot down but there is really no need to make the same point over and over again.

I have lost count of the number of times that someone has posted "I can't remember who said it but .... " if the person who said it was me and the poster has taken it on board and used it and their animals are benefitting from it ... It makes you feel on top of the world


----------



## Spider Call (Mar 23, 2007)

Tina said:


> I have to ask... how long is it since either of you posted in Shelled? Yes there were problems in the past but there haven't been for many months now. There's a different group of people using shelled now who are far more tolerant. There'll always be a minority that are fixed in their ideas, just as there are in every section, but it's certainly not the majority. In the time I've been mod'ing in shelled I've not seen either of you post or get flamed.
> 
> I'd be interested in vikki3683's opinion of shelled as she very recently started a thread in there... no flaming went on and everyone who posted on the thread tried to give good advice and welcome her to the section.
> 
> ...


A while ago.
I only posted in there to aid a friend who pretty much got chewed up and was rather upset. 
I don't keep shelled things myself, soo if it has got better sorry for the comment. 
I was just saying where I do and do not feel ok posting.


----------



## Magpie (Apr 12, 2008)

I hardly ever feel confident enough to post because after reading around the forums for a while I feel that anything I say will just be ignored or shot down, and the last thing I want is for someone to be thinking my animals aren't being looked after properly because I don't do things by the book all the time. A lot of people on here do seem to be on their high horse if they're made aware that they clearly know more than you on a subject, so the simple questions I'd like to ask, I don't. For example if I wanted to post asking about if you could feed an insect-eating lizard only non-insect foods, or if a creature that needs UV could survive without it, I know straight away that someone would jump the gun and assume I was either planning to do it, or that I'm currently doing it, when all it was was a hypothetical question. There are a lot of 'stupid' questions in my head that I'd like to ask about animals, but I daren't because you know what reaction you'll get a lot of the time.
I mean, that's not to say there aren't some really nice, helpful people on here who have the patience for beginners' questions, but through my experience with the site so far, I've found that your posts aren't even noticed if you haven't got a load of posts or been around a long time, and when they are, it's only really to pick up on something you've said wrong.
I often find myself over-compensating for things, like when I ask what I think is probably a stupid question, I have to say a million times, 'I'm no expert', 'I'm guessing..', and 'I'm a complete beginner in this and have no idea' just so people won't say, 'what, are you mad ?! of course you can't do that !'. I do the same when I'm posting something people might find contradictory to what I've posted already, like if I post in one topic that I don't have the space to take on any more animals at the minute, and then go on to make or post in another topic asking about an animal I'm thinking of keeping. I feel like I have to clearly state several times, 'I'm thinking for the future I might want to own one, not for now, I don't have the space, it'll be a long way down the line, blah blah blah'... It's tiring !

And sometimes I think I might not be taken seriously because of the animals I own/don't own. I suppose I own 'beginners animals', pets for pansies, a lot of furries, and soft old snakes like corns who wouldn't bite you if you tried to make them, and not anything like a big fat python or boa that could do you some damage. I guess I'm one of the lightweights of the forum, maybe that's what it is, haha.


----------



## Marinam2 (Sep 4, 2007)

Crownan said:


> Personally I will post threads and replies on anything, I will say whatever I think and if people dont like it, what do I care? Its a load of randoms sitting behind a PC screen! So what if they 'flame' me? If the flaming is warrented then I will take heed of the advice etc, fairy snuff. But if its just opinion and nothing more....who cares?


heheheheh SNAP!!!

Marina


----------



## Dustcart (May 31, 2008)

Hi,
Just my tuppence worth as a newbie here.
Before i get my Royal (soon i hope) i thought i'd scour the web and learn as much as i possibly can. (Kinda helps my intended pet and me really) I was told about this place and since coming here and reading (for hours) i ain't seen much in the way of flaming or similar. It appears to be a friendly and HELPFUL place. So i clicked on post with confidence.

Let's face it peeps, a tad of care in constructing your posts might ward off potential trouble.


----------



## debcot1 (May 13, 2008)

I've been getting info from this forum for ages but never registered as I have read so many posts were people get nasty and think you havent got a clue. ive been keeping reptiles for the past 7 years but am a 'newbie' on here and from the general impression i get i will get treated as though i havent got a clue because of my number of posts.

there are alot of lovely genuine people on here that offer brilliant advice and dont 'judge' you but it is a great shame that there are a few that make some people feel that they will be treated in a negative way!!


----------



## Meko (Apr 29, 2007)

Dustcart said:


> Hi,
> Just my tuppence worth as a newbie here.
> Before i get my Royal (soon i hope) i thought i'd scour the web and learn as much as i possibly can. (Kinda helps my intended pet and me really) I was told about this place and since coming here and reading (for hours) i ain't seen much in the way of flaming or similar. It appears to be a friendly and HELPFUL place. So i clicked on post with confidence.
> 
> Let's face it peeps, a tad of care in constructing your posts might ward off potential trouble.


 
i spend too much time on here and rarely see any flaming, although i don't read every thread.
Most of the time when things get heated (that i've seen) its where people have been given advice, chosen to ignore it and then come back with a problem because they've done something wrong. I don't see it as getting flamed but the person replying getting frustrated because the person was told what they should do in the first place.


----------



## Siman (Apr 12, 2008)

Meko said:


> i spend too much time on here and rarely see any flaming, although i don't read every thread.
> Most of the time when things get heated (that i've seen) its where people have been given advice, chosen to ignore it and then come back with a problem because they've done something wrong. I don't see it as getting flamed but the person replying getting frustrated because the person was told what they should do in the first place.


Thats true, but i think some people can be a bit "short tempered" with people who they may automatically assume they know nothing or they need talking down too...

I.e some people and the "younger" users..


----------



## Vase (Jul 14, 2007)

Magpie said:


> I hardly ever feel confident enough to post because after reading around the forums for a while I feel that anything I say will just be ignored or shot down, and the last thing I want is for someone to be thinking my animals aren't being looked after properly because I don't do things by the book all the time. A lot of people on here do seem to be on their high horse if they're made aware that they clearly know more than you on a subject, so the simple questions I'd like to ask, I don't. For example if I wanted to post asking about if you could feed an insect-eating lizard only non-insect foods, or if a creature that needs UV could survive without it, I know straight away that someone would jump the gun and assume I was either planning to do it, or that I'm currently doing it, when all it was was a hypothetical question. There are a lot of 'stupid' questions in my head that I'd like to ask about animals, but I daren't because you know what reaction you'll get a lot of the time.
> I mean, that's not to say there aren't some really nice, helpful people on here who have the patience for beginners' questions, but through my experience with the site so far, I've found that your posts aren't even noticed if you haven't got a load of posts or been around a long time, and when they are, it's only really to pick up on something you've said wrong.
> I often find myself over-compensating for things, like when I ask what I think is probably a stupid question, I have to say a million times, 'I'm no expert', 'I'm guessing..', and 'I'm a complete beginner in this and have no idea' just so people won't say, 'what, are you mad ?! of course you can't do that !'. I do the same when I'm posting something people might find contradictory to what I've posted already, like if I post in one topic that I don't have the space to take on any more animals at the minute, and then go on to make or post in another topic asking about an animal I'm thinking of keeping. I feel like I have to clearly state several times, 'I'm thinking for the future I might want to own one, not for now, I don't have the space, it'll be a long way down the line, blah blah blah'... It's tiring !
> 
> And sometimes I think I might not be taken seriously because of the animals I own/don't own. I suppose I own 'beginners animals', pets for pansies, a lot of furries, and soft old snakes like corns who wouldn't bite you if you tried to make them, and not anything like a big fat python or boa that could do you some damage. I guess I'm one of the lightweights of the forum, maybe that's what it is, haha.



I know what your saying. Ages ago I made a list of every animal I liked. The list then got shorter and shorter, keeping on there only animals I'd love to own. Its still pretty big but not massive. I have a spare room for my 'exotic' pets and when I'm trying to sort the room out (like now) I like to know what animals I have space for and what I dont. And also if I have the capabilities of caring for them properly. 

Google has so much conflicting advice its scary. I tried a search to find out the viv sizes that people use for ackies. It went from a 3x2x2 for a trio to a 6x2x2 for one. So I asked on here and got great advice. Now I know I have room for them. But I feel worried for want of a better word about asking for viv sizes for the other animals on my list. Just incase I get replies like..."Hang on, you were asking about ackies in that thread, and now your asking about BTS's in this one. Make your mind up"

I havent been on the forum long enough to know the score really but I'm on other forums and the amount of replies you get when you start a thread depends on who you are and who replies. Not saying its like that on here but it is on a lot of the other forums I'm on, which is annoying. I have found on here though that in a thread your posts sometimes get ignored, as if you said something at a party but nobody heard you. IMO anyway.

Darn good forum though, and I've learnt loads, so thanks to everyone who's helped with that :2thumb:


----------



## fundo (Feb 7, 2007)

eeji said:


> I've been here since what feels like when time began..... It was really friendly and a fun place to be back then. I was never off the forum, it had a really good community feel to it and I made lots of good friends here.
> 
> Then as it grew it started attracting the 'know-it-alls' - the sort of person who's opinion was set in stone and is the only way to do something. Anyone who had alternative ideas got flamed, and so the forum started to split.
> 
> ...


Amen!


----------



## fundo (Feb 7, 2007)

In reference to some earlier comments, I love the shelled section! There's no greater challenge than posting an opinion in there and not p***ing off the anoraks. It's like starving a lion, then offering it your arm


----------



## Meko (Apr 29, 2007)

Siman said:


> Thats true, but i think some people can be a bit "short tempered" with people who they may automatically assume they know nothing or they need talking down too...
> 
> I.e some people and the "younger" users..


 
i don't discriminate against young people.. i'm an arse to everybody i meet :whistling2:


----------



## cape123 (Apr 7, 2008)

no i dont feel i could start a post as i have seen some of the answers people give others and to be quite honest i wouldnt want to be upset by the replys, so i just sit here reading the posts seeing whats going on.


----------



## Ghostface (May 31, 2007)

cape123 said:


> no i dont feel i could start a post as i have seen some of the answers people give others and to be quite honest i wouldnt want to be upset by the replys, so i just sit here reading the posts seeing whats going on.


Why though? We can't kill you over the internet... although that would come in handy for certain people.. :devil:

It's always intimidating posting on a forum with as many members as this one has, but if you need help - then ask for it. It's what this place is for. It's also for talking about random crap, everyone else does - so join in some time : victory:

Once you get the jist of this place, and learn who to avoid  it becomes quite a fun place to waste your life!


----------



## debcot1 (May 13, 2008)

cape123 said:


> no i dont feel i could start a post as i have seen some of the answers people give others and to be quite honest i wouldnt want to be upset by the replys, so i just sit here reading the posts seeing whats going on.


i agree, many a time i have written and reply and thought :censor: it whats the point!!!


----------



## Marinam2 (Sep 4, 2007)

cape123 said:


> no i dont feel i could start a post as i have seen some of the answers people give others and to be quite honest i wouldnt want to be upset by the replys, so i just sit here reading the posts seeing whats going on.



Why would you be upset though........these are just words of faceless people who dont know you or anything about you other than what you choose to post about. So why would that upset you, gosh you need to toughen up my friend!!

Marina


----------



## vikki3683 (May 16, 2008)

Thanks for all the replies guys - thought Id messed up again starting a poat. Lol
In response to your post Tina about what I think of the slelled section - i feel more 'at home' and confident in that section than in the Lizards section.
I thouight it was wrong that it was being emplyed that I didnt carry on of my posts after i had replies - but as ive explained on this thread, im not well and i just forget - im waiting to bee assessed in the next hour to see if i have to go back into hospital because im having another breakdown.
There are some lovely people on here - ive got quite chatty with a few whom have helped me loads, but there are some who appears to be 'know it alls' and the 'new' members may feel quite intimidatin - i do for a start and im 25!! so id hate to think of how the 'youngsters' feel


----------



## Hardwicki (Jun 18, 2007)

I post regardless and have been keeping reps for 6 years now...i dont care if i look stupid at least i had the guts to ask however obvious/daft the question may be!:2thumb:


----------



## Hardwicki (Jun 18, 2007)

Meko said:


> i don't discriminate against young people.. i'm an arse to everybody i meet :whistling2:


No your not Meko your lovely really!!
I still want your dog


----------



## Siman (Apr 12, 2008)

Meko said:


> i don't discriminate against young people.. i'm an arse to everybody i meet :whistling2:


Didn't mean you - I know that already :Na_Na_Na_Na:

Nah just some people if you say something they don't agree with call you "childish" or sometimes will talk down to someone younger because they're younger.

But if you have a fourteen year old who's kept corn snakes since (s)he was 10, and you have a thirty year old who's kept corn snakes for a month, its possible the younger person could have a more valid opinion and more knowledge/information.


----------



## AshMashMash (Oct 28, 2007)

Ghostface said:


> Once you get the jist of this place, and learn who to avoid  it becomes quite a fun place to waste your life!


Haha, love that quote  So true.


----------



## chrisss_proctor (Aug 15, 2007)

I gave up being cautious when posting. I make myself look like an idiot normally, so why not on here too!: victory:


----------



## Reptilover (Jan 15, 2007)

I usually post in confidence, unless i have someone who is following me around the forum trying to create a big deal over a small mistake or something similer.


----------



## It's corny but.. (Feb 7, 2007)

Karl_1989 said:


> To be honest this forums gone down hill abit, It used to be full of helpfull people full of friendly advice.
> But since the 18+ section was put in there been more and more idiots on here and most of the good ones have left.
> 
> Now its full of people who seem to think they know it all cos they brought a leo and browsed the forum for 5 mins


 
lol that's so true.. when i joined a year or so ago i felt welcomed, there was a really good feel about this forum.

now you get people replying to threads even when they don't have a clue - 'hope you find out' etc., guys with no experience scaring the heck out of newbies or younger members with false or misleading info, people flaming others just because they can. makes it very difficult. 

victim of your own success rfuk?


----------



## Greenphase (Feb 9, 2008)

This has turned into an interesting read.

There will always be the odd and i do mean the odd person that will try to belittle people but i have found in most cases you can always pm said person and sort things out with them.

I have returned to the forum after a break(all my fault) and found that there are still some very knowledgeable people here and that in most cases a question will get an answer from someone given time.There are questions that have been asked a hundred times but then not everyone has seen these and they just dont want to troll through all the posts to find an answer to something.

I was here originally from the very beginning.I think i was about the 15th person to register to the forum and have seen many good members come and go due to conflicts in the past but they still come back occasionally so it just goes to show how good a place this is.

I would say that on the whole 95% of the time the forum runs great.It has problems in certain sections where a lotof arguements can arise but they are dealt with quickly by a very good,understanding and impartial team of mods.

Im pleased to be back in the community of RFUK and should never have let things go to what they did in the beginning as it wasnt until to late that i realised what this place means to me.It is the place where i spend most of my online time and i intend on that not changing anytime soon.

A forum is only as good as its members and this place has some of the best on the net.


----------



## chrisss_proctor (Aug 15, 2007)

Boas n Burms said:


> This has turned into an interesting read.
> 
> There will always be the odd and i do mean the odd person that will try to belittle people but i have found in most cases you can always pm said person and sort things out with them.
> 
> ...


You have obviously had these experiences here many times, I have had a few problems with people on here, but I'd like to think that I've dealt with it well enough to sort of agree to disagree.

I have found that there are some very helpful and friendly people who want nothing more than to help others make the most out of their animals by giving the best advice for care and general husbandry. I want to be one of the helpful people, but on occasion, I do let my mood take over.

This is my favourite of 4 sites, I rarely log on to the others, there are just too good a people on here usually.

Sorry to waffle. I'll end it now, Bye.


----------



## Lizard Loft (Mar 1, 2008)

I can honestly say i can post with complete confidence, i have posted numerous things on here, and replied on other posts where i though i might be able to help.

Ive never 'flamed' anyone as i think its out of order, everyone makes mistakes i know i have and those who flame everyone have too, but they just forget to mention and think they have a right to verbally attack someone on the grounds that they arn't doing somthing they should. most of the time new ppl get flamed but they have been given the wrong info by shops etc. A post count means nothing, people who may have had reps for years may only just have joined.

I know experience is a big thing when keeping any animal, but just because someone has only had a rep for a day and not 10 years doesn't mean their opinons are no good. an animal can do somthing in that first day that an owner with over 20+years experience has never seen.

I just give my personal opinions and experiences, and expect others to do the same, and i think its disgraceful alot of people feel they can't post because of a few people who like to kick off, 

anyway thats my piece said lol, if anyone ever sees a thread off me feel free to post as i wont flame you and will try my best to reply as soon as i can: victory:,

oh yea and in order to get people to reply on my posts is i make the post titles more interesting then the question lol :2thumb:


----------



## repkid (Nov 30, 2007)

A lot of my threads dont normally get many replys but as long as I find out what I need to find out I dont care!:lol2:


----------



## Meko (Apr 29, 2007)

Hardwicki said:


> No your not Meko your lovely really!!
> I still want your dog


 
you didn't think that ages ago when i said Bury birds were easy :whistling2:

which dog? 
Wilo or Rio....


----------



## littlejay (May 25, 2008)

I'm a newbee here so dont post a lot because I hardly know anyone here , I think it also depends on your experiences of posting on other forums.Its hard for a newcomer to fit straight in I think and obviously pople reply to their friends posts first rather than a strangers. I may not post a lot but I spend a long tiome reading and learning on here.
littlejay


----------



## chrisss_proctor (Aug 15, 2007)

littlejay said:


> I'm a newbee here so dont post a lot because I hardly know anyone here , I think it also depends on your experiences of posting on other forums.Its hard for a newcomer to fit straight in I think and obviously pople reply to their friends posts first rather than a strangers. I may not post a lot but I spend a long tiome reading and learning on here.
> littlejay


That too is a very good point. I think posting should be for questions and responses like was said earlier in the thread. There's no need for pointless comments and trying to upset people. Knowledge is a powerful thing and the more knowledge you have, the more powerful we as individuals and as a society of herpers become more powerful. This is a top site and has top people on here, lets have more good people on here :2thumb:!


----------



## zukomonitor (Nov 11, 2007)

I have not voted and not read previous posts.

the point of a forum is to share knowledge and discuss things.

too many people think - ill just ask on RFuk

do your research!!!

i am only familiar with a couple of species, but i wont post on someones thread if it can be answered by google. simple


----------



## bluerain (Jun 7, 2008)

I do like to post if i have something i need help with, but i must admit that when it comes to answerig threads i often think twice. Although most people are nice and make allowances for you being an amatur, some folk just seem to like to slate whatever you say.


----------



## Fraggle (Feb 24, 2008)

I dont mind starting threads at all if i need to know something- id rather ask a stupid question and get the advice i need to help my animals than not ask and get it wrong for the sake of looking daft to a bunch of strangers i will probably never meet.
For every question you see on here and think is stupid because YOU know the answer, there's probably 50 people out there thanking the lord that somebody else asked cos they needed to know too! and to those people, its a very _good_ question 
Isnt that what this forum is for?
I hate people who just scour forums looking for someone to pick on- i dont use other forums often- i used a dog forum a few times but found the same couple of people slagging off everyone on there for everything and 'knowing best' even about things they didnt have any experience with. I think people like that are not worth taking any notice of, cos to be fair, its some :censor: sat in front of a computer, who will never know who you are, and isnt likely to come and get you for asking a question! 
And as for only trusting the advice from those with a billion squillion posts, surely they are less likely to be looking after their reptiles properly, what with all that time in front of the computer? Trust the 'eggs' who are too busy cleaning out, checking temps and feeding to post alday, i say... lol!:Na_Na_Na_Na:


----------



## bluerain (Jun 7, 2008)

Wowee this thread ended up being a hum dinger, and its comforting lots of people felt bit intimidated by answering posts too. Its true you cant see the others faces, and so i probably shouldnt care, and id agree i do need to toughen up. Still hurts though!


----------



## 12kslr33 (May 20, 2008)

I feel confident in posting as whatever i post is relevant, everyone on here is willing to help and offer support to be honest my turtles R.I could of carried on a lot longer if it wasnt for certain members helping me spot it early. Obviously if a reps welfare is coming into question then maybe sometimes people can overreact but then again doesnt it just show how concerned they are for you and your rep, i think this is a good thing and all the experienced keepers out there can relate back to us newbies as 1 day they got there first aswell.


----------



## pumpkineater (Jan 13, 2008)

To be honest, i've been a member for a while and don't feel the need to post often as a) most of my questions can be answered searching here or Google b) There are many more knowledgeable people on here than I, so my contributions probably aren't needed.

They probably aren't needed here either!


----------



## Opheodrys (Feb 5, 2007)

pumpkineater said:


> To be honest, i've been a member for a while and don't feel the need to post often as a) most of my questions can be answered searching here or Google b) There are many more knowledgeable people on here than I, so my contributions probably aren't needed.
> 
> They probably aren't needed here either!


The more opinions and contributions the better in my opinion!


----------



## mEOw (Dec 28, 2006)

i'll happily post anywhere on the forums... if someone dissagrees with me on something and instead of haveing a civilised discussion about it (which is what the forums are for afterall) wants to have a go at me or try and kick up a fuss i will quite simply put them on ignore untill it all blows over.. simple really.. 
Owen


----------



## jilly40 (Jun 10, 2008)

yes ive said hi on the intros ive had no relpies ive asked questions bout my hedgehog no replies. im cumin 2 the point of whats the point n what have i done? may just read n get info at least thats not upseting.jill


----------



## Meko (Apr 29, 2007)

Jilly.. with your APH question you're probably better asking in the domestic / exotic pets section.

There's more snake / lizard owners on the forum so more chance of somebody seeing the a thread in here an replying. With APH's there's only a limited number of people on here who own them so less chance of your question being seen.

If you repost it in here Other Pets and Exotics - Reptile Forums UK you'll probably get a better response.. although possibly not today with it being the weekend.


----------



## AshMashMash (Oct 28, 2007)

jilly40 said:


> yes ive said hi on the intros ive had no relpies ive asked questions bout my hedgehog no replies. im cumin 2 the point of whats the point n what have i done? may just read n get info at least thats not upseting.jill


No offense, but in 7 posts and being a member 5 days I dont think you can really say no one repsonds to you?

Also, as meko says, only a small number of people keep hedgehogs. They need to be on here, see your posts, and then have the time to write an answer... give them time...


----------



## jilly40 (Jun 10, 2008)

well i disagree all other newbies got replies after my post. but hey ho live n learn i will just keep reading. seems


AshMashMash said:


> No offense, but in 7 posts and being a member 5 days I dont think you can really say no one repsonds to you?
> 
> Also, as meko says, only a small number of people keep hedgehogs. They need to be on here, see your posts, and then have the time to write an answer... give them time...


----------



## jilly40 (Jun 10, 2008)

many thanks 4 reply im green i understand that,but i love all my pets n just want 2 improve ive found the answer i was kooking 4. but ill keep reading.jill


----------



## bluerain (Jun 7, 2008)

:notworthy:Aww Jilly - dont be put of. Im new here too, and nobody knows me, but you"ve got too post!! If you dont post , you wont enjoy the forum, and it takes time!!! Hey, iv got three good new friends now, and everybody really is very nice.


----------



## medusa0373 (Mar 18, 2008)

On a lot of posts I've found people to be incredibly helpful, prepared to ask first and sometimes flame later LOL. 

On the other hand, I do find the boards to be very "clique-y" - you either fit in or you don't. Some people seem to be far more popular far more quickly than other members and that can be a bit off putting, I think, when you join in a thread and are effectively ignored because you're not part of the "clique".


----------



## Lisasgeckonursery (Feb 14, 2008)

it's not just newbies it happens too but most people on here are friendly and helpful its just a shame that some people feel the need to flame others or make snide comments. I'd say don't worry tho we're all human and a lot gets lost in translation as you cannot recognise the tone etc of a comment in text form and unless the criticism is warranted then try to ignore it. we can all be sensitive when it comes to our pets and if your pet is happy then its the flamers problem not yours.


----------



## Sambee (Jul 4, 2008)

If I need help with something about my reptiles, I wouldn't be too scared to ask. I would rather know that there are experts on here willing to help and risk the chance of someone thinking I was stupid than not find out important information that I need. 

What would be the point in registering on this forum if I was going to be to scared to ask :lol2:


----------



## MrMike (Jun 28, 2008)

After only being a member for about a month, I can honestly say I was nervous/scared to post the "n00b" questions, but after the responses I received everyone I have spoke to truly has the animals welfare at heart.

The newbie section is there for a reason, to ask the "silly" questions that experienced owners take for granted.

Also took me 3 weeks to realise there was a search button :lol2:


----------



## mummybear (Nov 5, 2007)

Personally I will answer any question I feel I am able to answer and have recently started checking in often on the newbie site, my motto being we've all been newbies at one time and have all asked stupid questions and made mistakes.

I must admit that 99.9% of my knowledge is about beardies, and of course anyone can feel free to pm me if they don't want to start a thread/post due to being worried about being made to feel stupid, if I know the answer I'll tell you if not I may tell you to start a thread or pm someone I think will know.

I have seen a fair few threads getting out of hand lately but not as much as there was, but hey it's better to feel stupid and ask your question than to get things wrong and put a pet at risk of harm : victory:


----------



## amber_gekko (May 11, 2007)

I think maybe you've been unlucky in the posts you've made that you haven't had a reply or not many, but sometimes the posts move so fast that people dont always see them.
With everything you always get a few bad eggs but on the whole id say rfuk is a good bunch of people, theres loads of people that are knowledgable so any questions you have there's always someone can help or has experience no matter what the subject


----------



## yellow dragons (Jul 17, 2008)

i think what the newbies and myself need to remember the reason of this site is to help each others and bring on and teach people who want reptiles.


----------



## alnessman (Mar 8, 2008)

HadesDragons said:


> People generally only get "flamed" if they ask for advice, are given it, then refuse to take it, or if it's a very simple question and they are asking on here rather than spending 5 minutes on Google / using the search button...
> 
> I don't know which of your questions you are referring to when you say you haven't got many responses - I've had a quick look through some of your threads, and the ones I have looked at have either already been answered in the first couple of posts (in which case there isn't really a need for another 10 people to post "I agree"), or you're asking about a rarer species - e.g. the Monkey Tails. I know of only a couple of people on here who keep them and could actually give you photos etc... You have to remember that if it's a difficult question, it may take time for someone to be able to tell you the answer, simply because most people don't know the answer...


spot on Andy couldnt agree more


----------



## Andatariel (Jul 15, 2008)

I don't get scared asking questions but I do worry about answering them.

I mean earlier on I was dead worried about passing on a peice of advice that the vet had given me when my pet was exhibiting the same type of behavious as the pet of the OP because I don't like getting flamed for having followed and passed on a vets reccommendation, 
Y'know, I mean why should people be flamed because they followed what a professional told them?


----------



## Lisasgeckonursery (Feb 14, 2008)

exactly, what is wrong with someone just calmly and politely telling you that the info was wrong, without getting emotional or personal about it.


----------



## SpoonGirl (Nov 16, 2007)

I've asked a few obvious questions in my time, but almost everyone here is so mature and friendly that I never feel worried about it - and I always remember that chances are if one person doesn't know something, there's always going to be a few more people who want an answer to the same question, and can read the thread and find out easily.

Although I did read one *horrible* thread recently when someone was really spiteful to a person asking when to feed their corn fluffs instead of pinkies. That was, however a rarity. I don't usually see threads like that.


----------



## EVIEMAY (Mar 6, 2008)

Just been reading this thread with interest - I'm from the "other" side - yea the dreaded shelled section - I have been a member for months and quite often read the "off topic chat" but have never participated. Although most of you do seem a friendly bunch and some of you do make me laugh - I personally have not felt confident to reply. It does actullay seem like them and us....

I know nothing about snakes and lizards and dont preach about tortoises either. But in the pages of replies to this thread I have only seen 3 names that post on shelled. Again that goes to show that there is a definate divide.

However to answer the original question - I only reply on shelled if I feel I can give correct advice and for now I just enjoy reading the off topic threads....


----------



## million1 (Jun 15, 2008)

When i start posts in fufture i will think very carefully about what i put in it/how i word as people on here can quite easily jump on you telling you you are wrong, this may not be intentional, perhaps its just the way some of the replies are written, but i would rather think twice about what im writing rather than get peoples backs up.

One of my first threads involved pictures of my mixed species viv set up...

Little did i know this would not go down well, while no-one was accusing me of deliberatly trying to cause my pets stress i did feel like i had been taken over the coals somewhat for advice i had been given elsewere.

But thats all part of life surley? Some people will congratulate you on what they see as achievments while others opinions are different.

I suggested chopping a car up on another forum to make a trike, again some people loved the idea, others thought it was a terrible waste of a car thats no longer in production and i should be hung drawn and quartered.

it happens, generally you get the advice you need from any post but you may get some negative feed back to.


----------



## fatratsandcheesekk (May 18, 2008)

i feel more confident now when i asked some which i didnt know the answer to but were simple i did feel some of the answers were harsh


----------



## Jazz (Jul 21, 2008)

I'm not new to keeping herps, but I'm very new to the forum. I don't feel very confident at the moment, but then having only just joined it takes time to get to know people. It also doesn't help that I'm very shy!


Anyway, Hi! I shall probably mainly only lurk unless I have a real pressing need to ask something, because as I said before, I'm ridiculously shy and having been out of the hobby for five years (not through choice) and slowly coming back into it, I need to build my confidence up again!

But I thought I ought to make at least one post!


----------



## Pauline (Aug 3, 2006)

Don't let it worry you if someone "flames" you, I think we've probably all been there at some time, I know I have and I'm neither young nor a newbie. 

The thing to do is read as much as you can, then ask away. Experience is abundant on here and most people are willing to help. I know I will help anyone as much as I can and if I can't answer at least I can try to point people in the right direction. *Anyone who has a query about snakes is welcome to pm me if they are afraid to post.*

The things that annoy folk on here are people who can't be bothered to search for info themselves and people who ask advice then refuse to listen to the advice given.


----------



## StuW247 (Jun 14, 2008)

All of my questions have been answered quiet quickly, and in a respectfull manner. From that i feel that i can post when i need to ask a question


----------



## Vase (Jul 14, 2007)

I'm not 'affraid' to ask questions. But I've noticed that the number of replies you get (by the most part) depends on your username, rather than the question.

IMO anyway.


----------



## akuma 天 (Apr 15, 2008)

I have no problems asking questions, but then again I'm very confident.

I'd rather ask a stupid question and get an answer, than look stupid for not asking.

That said, I certainly have noticed in my 18 months of rep keeping there is a small group of older "elitist" keepers.

Now fair play to them they've been keeping reps longer than some of us have been alive, so by expierence they are very knowledgable, but its the attitiute of my way, or no way at all that puts people off asking.

Remember, everyone starts somewhere, and everyone was a newbie once.


----------



## Viper (May 10, 2008)

1st one as even if im wrong, someone will always correct you and you end up learning more than not posting at all and thinking your theory is right !!


----------



## matty (Feb 17, 2007)

If there's something I want/need to know then I'll just ask it.

Tbh, it's only a forum & I just laugh at the morons who think that they're intimidating 'cause in real life they'd probably just cower in a corner or something if someone spoke to them the way they speak to people on here. 

If you need to know something just ask, 9 times out of 10 people will answer your question.


----------



## Meko (Apr 29, 2007)

Pauline said:


> The things that annoy folk on here are people who can't be bothered to search for info themselves and people who ask advice then refuse to listen to the advice given.


 
you missed the main one....


the people who:

register
log in
click 'lizard'
click 'new thread'
and then ask a question that has already been asked and is at the top of the page in clear view before they started a new thread.

People do get wound up / annoyed at having to type the same answer out 2 minutes apart because somebody didn't have a quick look before typing.
It's a bit like going to the library, most people go in, go to the section they want and have a look for the book they want. If its not there they ask the librarian.
The other people walk straight in and ask the librarian who finds it in exactly the same place the person would if they'd looked.

It doesn't mean you have to trawl through 600 pages to see if the question has been asked but a quick bit of common sense browsing helps everybody.


----------



## Lisasgeckonursery (Feb 14, 2008)

you're right meko but if they're newbies can't people just 
A)not answer if they feel annoyed or B)point them to the search option 
instead of getting wound up and scaring them off, no disrespect intended.


----------



## HABU (Mar 21, 2007)

ask whatever you want to ask. don't be intimidated. what are they going to do? go to your house and grab you by the hair of the head? it's the internet. whoopee-do. i've shown my butt plenty of times here i'll admit but i keep posting. anymore i just try not to get into a p*ss*ng contest with anyone unless they deserve it. have fun... it's a forum. you're going to get cyberfights now and then. heck, a lot of us are drunk half the time anyway. don't sweat the small stuff. there are moderators and members here. members don't have any rank. post counts mean zilch.

just my opinion....:whistling2::lol2:


----------



## Lisasgeckonursery (Feb 14, 2008)

here here i concur :lol2:


----------



## akuma 天 (Apr 15, 2008)

about_a_girluk said:


> here here i concur :lol2:


I agree too, but the "elitists" still annoy me.


----------



## Sid.lola (Jan 10, 2008)

I want to be an elitist! (Unless I can find another way to annoy you...)

I think some people bahave that way online because they are superior to NOone in the real world and have an inferiority complex.

That having been said, around certain times of the month or when I'm having a bad day I do struggle not to leave sarcastic little comments all over the place. 
But that's not just to new people or dumb questions; I do genuinely find every molecule and thought on the planet unbearable irritating on days like that. Just ignore me or tell me to f off! I won't care the next day!


----------



## akuma 天 (Apr 15, 2008)

:lol2:

You'll never be an elitist!

Many of the long term keepers are an invaluable source of info, they've help me loads, but a few do indeed seem begrudged to have all the "newbies" intrude on there once private hobby, asking stupid questions.

As I'm sure you've read before, I'd have began keeping snakes much earlier were it not for an encounter with an "elitist" moron in an un-named rep shop. He made out like I'd need years of study and research and I have to reorganise my entire house, just for a corn.

OK, I was only 18 at the time, but basically that was a pack of lies, told by a man eager to keep "kids" out of his hobby.


----------



## Ssthisto (Aug 31, 2006)

I think everyone should remember two things, both of which are equally important.

1. Ask and answer all questions knowing that the people who will see what you type are all real people - talk to them as you would hope to be talked to.
2. Remember that you can just click the red X up in the corner if someone says something that offends you - they haven't just slapped you in the face, and if they are intentionally offensive, it's because they've forgotten rule 1. They may not realise that what they've said is offensive to you.

I have posted a number of times about *mistakes* I have made, and never felt as though I was being bullied, lambasted or flamed for having made a mistake. I have also posted a number of times about things that I don't believe other people should do - and my personal impression is that people do read what I'm saying in the spirit in which I'm saying it, even if they might not always agree. I attribute this to the following things:

1. First and foremost... I learn from my damn mistakes. If I do something wrong twice, I deserve to be shouted at. Learning to take your "forum knocks" gracefully is important. Remember Rule 2.
2. I am willing to listen to and accept the advice of those who know more than I do - and to verbally acknowledge that I have taken that advice on board.
3. Even when I disagree with advice provided, I say so in a polite and reasonable manner and try to give examples from personal experience when possible. I do not swear except for in threads on 18+ (and then, sparingly and generally not directed AT anyone I'm talking to - and there has been at least one case where I have apologised for the use of a strong word and tried to explain WHY I chose that word). 
4. I try very hard to use correct spelling and grammar, and choose my words carefully when I write. Before I post, I proof-read my post and ensure that I have actually said what I mean to say - and that I have not specifically singled out one person to be particularly offensive to. 

To post successfully on forums you DO have to have a reasonably thick skin.


----------



## Sid.lola (Jan 10, 2008)

akuma 天;2146949 said:


> :lol2:
> 
> You'll never be an elitist!


Harsh! Go on now, kick me when I'm down  












:lolsign:


----------



## akuma 天 (Apr 15, 2008)

Sid.lola said:


> Harsh! Go on now, kick me when I'm down
> 
> 
> 
> :lolsign:


*kicks*

:lol2:


----------



## Furrag (Oct 11, 2007)

Ssthisto said:


> I think everyone should remember two things, both of which are equally important.
> 
> 1. Ask and answer all questions knowing that the people who will see what you type are all real people - talk to them as you would hope to be talked to.
> 2. Remember that you can just click the red X up in the corner if someone says something that offends you - they haven't just slapped you in the face, and if they are intentionally offensive, it's because they've forgotten rule 1. They may not realise that what they've said is offensive to you.
> ...


Quoted for truth.


----------



## Kami22 (Apr 21, 2008)

Sid.lola said:


> I want to be an elitist! (Unless I can find another way to annoy you...)
> 
> I think some people bahave that way online because they are superior to NOone in the real world and have an inferiority complex.
> 
> ...


could not agree more (on both points)... :2thumb:


----------



## the chameleon man (Jan 31, 2008)

confidence...
its all about that....
i personally dont care if anyone listens or dosent want to take advice...
i just give out my advice and thats it...
you can take a horse to water..... but you cant make him have a wee....
(have a drink) lol...
i think forums are brill, this is the only one i really come on...
ive made some nice friends on here and i hope to make some more..
dont be afraid to post, its not like some ones going to come round and break your legs if you post wrong or your just feeling lonely and want to chat about pointless things...
chat away and type away... 
sod off to the miserable gits out there...and remember to never put yourself down.... theres always someone who will do it for you....
take care you all and as they say in yankee doodle land.. you`ll all have a nice day....


----------

